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Birth Order

May 21, 2007

In college I did a lot of research and work on birth order and how it affects personality and leadership style. When I found out I was having twins I was interested to see how not really being an oldest, middle, or youngest would affect them.

A. is my “first born” by exactly sixty seconds. (I was amazed by how often I get asked “which one’s the oldest?” Even by people who are twins!) R. is the “baby” of the family. Research has shown that the oldest child will often take on the role of the parent. He/she may model their behavior. Ever hear people complain about their bossy older sister?

Well, yesterday we were over a friend’s house for a meeting. We were out on their deck which has two Adirondack chairs. The girls can’t resist climbing on anything so it was no surprise that they wanted to climb up on these chairs. I let them sit on chairs but we’re ‘training’ them not to stand on them. So whenever they (and by “they” I mostly mean R, my little daredevil) would stand I would do my discipline routine and make them sit or remove them completely.

At one point I looked over and R was standing on the chair. I gave her my mom-isn’t-kidding-death-stare. Before I even had a chance to say “No standing, get down”, A. tells her “no,no,no,no” – complete with finger wag! Hmmm, does A know she’s the oldest already? I can only say that I love having twins and watching their little personalities shine through!

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. Swistle permalink
    May 21, 2007 3:25 pm

    I’ve noticed that if someone asks me, “Which one is older?,” it’s almost invariably someone who is herself/himself a twin. It seems like most non-twins think of twins as “the same age” but most twins think of the “who’s born first” issue as important. I’m not a twin myself, but find I really do think of Elizabeth as “older than” Edward–even though I also think of them as “the same age.”

    I love birth order stuff! Our five are going to be 8, 6, 2, 2, 0, and it makes for some interesting wonderings: will 6, 2, and 2 all be “middle children”? Also, it seems to us as if 8 and 6 are one grouping, and 2, 2, and 0 are a start-over, and 6 acts like that’s the case: he acts like the baby of the older group, rather than like a middle child.

  2. Lynne permalink
    May 22, 2007 5:39 pm

    I’ve thought about this a lot too. Do you think it gets rid of the middle child thing? I’d love to read some research on this. I’ll hae to go hunting.

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